Lavish wedding for Princess of Brunei, Hafizah Sururul Bolkiah with Pengiran Haji Muhammad Ruzaini

Congratulations to the Princess on her wedding on Friday. May you find your happily ever after :D

Soalan-soalan yang patut anda tanya bakal pasangan anda - bahagian 3

Rumah

• Apakah perasaan anda tentang kebersihan rumah,kekemasan rumah dan kerja rumah?
• Siapa bertanggung jawab untuk menjaga rumah?
• Apakah kerja rumah yang biasa anda lakukan?
• Pernahkah anda tinggal sendiri?Pernahkah awak tinggal bersama kawan2? Adakah anda hanya pernah tinggal bersama ibubapa kamu?
• Apa perasaan anda mengenai haiwan peliharaan?kucing, burung, ikan dll.
• Apakah jenis makanan pilihan anda? makanan melayu?western?makanan yg masak dari rumah sahaja?makanan yg mudah? masakan dari restaurant2 terkemuka?
• Kalau anda berdua telah kahwin dan pulang waktu yg sama, adakah si isteri yang perlu masak?
• Apakah perasaan anda tentang rokok?

Perbezaan

• Apakah benda2 kecil yg buat anda marah/kisah?
• Bagaimanakah harus ketidakfahaman di selesaikan?

Doa supaya suami tak kahwin lain

Surah taha 109 
يَوْمَئِذٍ لَّا تَنفَعُ الشَّفَاعَةُ إِلَّا مَنْ أَذِنَ لَهُ الرَّحْمَنُ وَرَضِيَ لَهُ قَوْلاً
Maksudnya:
Pada hari itu, tidak berfaedah syafaat (dari dan kepada sesiapapun) kecuali dari orang yang diizinkan oleh Allah yang melimpah-limpah rahmatNya, dan kepada orang yang diredai perkataannya.
Baca 3-5x lepas solat...ikhtiar...

Matchmaking and singles introduction for Muslims (Carian Jodoh) Offer Putrajaya Kuala Lumpur

Matchmaking and singles introduction for Muslims (Carian Jodoh) Offer Putrajaya Kuala Lumpur

How not to get rejected by men – stop being desperate

Desperation comes from something that you have no control or knowledge over.I guess it's something like this:  You meet a guy you like…you go out with him. Had a nice time and he says that he will call you but he never does.  Then you start over analysing and come out with the most preposterous reasons in the world why he didn't call. So, in the attempt to get his attention (assuming you have his email/number etc)you then buy him gifts, send him cards, send emails every 1 hour to ask how things are going. You think this will surely show him that you care and like him. He, in the other hand, feels you are smothering him, suffocating him and mommy-ing him – which he obvious doesn't want.

What you can do: Balance your life. DO NOT become too focus or obsess over one guy who does not call after going out with you or text to say ‘thank you, I had a good time’ or ‘it was nice having dinner with you. Hope you arrived safely’. Instead, take control of your life because that is the only thing you can control.  Value other things in life - like your family, friends, work, hobbies and so forth. If you can show a man that you a confident woman, who cares about all aspects of her life, a good conversationalist and is laid back with men, they may spark some interest towards you. Plus why would we want to waste time with men who we want a romantic relationship with, who doesn't even know how to say thank you?

(Perasan tak why certain men are attracted to married women? Ini universal truth…married women are more calm and are not desperate and of course other reasons for the men, kalau apa2 diorang tak payah nak commit. Basically, diorang nak fool around je.)

How to know you are the desperate type

 I know what is desperate and I know when a woman is desperate. I talk to these women most of the time. How do I know they (you) are desperate?

You think too much ahead. You just met the guy and you are already planning 6 months ahead of your relationship or even your wedding.”Maya tak apa, I tak bertunang pun tak apa. Simple wedding pun ok, senang for both sides. Yang penting I dapat kahwin”. Inilah antara jawapan yang saya dapat. Not that I am against it, but I am sure any parents, you yourself or even your future partner want a decent wedding. And yang penting bukanlah hanya "I dapat kahwin". The wedding that you would want is the one that you can share with friends and family, not just a get by wedding because you don't want to burden the guy. (Don't you think that your man should at least give you a wedding to remember of as a sign of his appreciation, love and wanting to spend his life with you?*we are not talking about Will's and Kate's wedding here ok?Even a man who enters an arranged marriage should give the woman he marries a decent wedding. Ni just my 2 cents).

Men sense desperation miles away and they are terrified of it. Men don’t think the same as women. Their needs are not the same as women. You need to re-think their needs from a man’s emotional standpoint.

Men don’t want to feel that they are responsible for your happiness. Take steps to keep yourself in better control of your life so that you are less panicky thinking about your future.

What are the things that a man notice when women are desperate?

You try to impress too much. You laugh at their jokes even when it’s not funny; you want to do everything for them, talk too much or you agree to pretty much everything they think of.

When you talk to a man, stay calm. There is no need to talk too much just because there is a silent moment in your conversation. Silent moments do happen, when it does, relax and simply move on…and jangan cerita pasal your last relationship because you don't know what to say.Jangan cerita. Zip it. That chapter is over and no man wants to hear about some lame guy from your past (we’ll talk about that some other time).

Try to focus on other areas of your life, have the lifestyle that you really want. Become an interesting person that other people want to know about. By doing this, you put yourself in control of your own happiness – and InsyaAllah men will naturally want to know more about you.

Desperate sangat ke nak pergi gathering/mixers single tu?

"Desperate sangat ke kita ni nak pergi event mixer macam tu? I tak desperate lagi...kenapa you pegi? Malulah, macam tak boleh cari boyfriend /girlfriend sendiri"

This is the typical feedback that we get from either people we invite to come to the mixer or friends to those who came to the mixer. Don't get us wrong, everyone is entitled to their opinions. If you are not desperate, then good for you. Enjoy your life and good luck on meeting new people at your own turf.

But, what if you don't? You met a lot of people but you still don't get anyone liking you or interested in you. You are decent looking, good family background with good education but no one seems available. Or you don't even know where single people are anymore. Everyone you know is either married, busy with their own life or drifted apart over the years. You bicker with your friends on where the single ladies or men are.

Allah has a plan for us all. On the 120th day of life, Allah gives us souls and ask the angels to write for us 4 things - our sustenance (rezeki), marriage (jodoh), qada & qadar and death, including the place where we will be buried. 

''So, kalau Tuhan dah plan untuk I buat apa nak cari...tunggu je lah.'' Yes, we get this answer too." Ye ke? Jadi kalau Allah plan untuk kita jadi kaya, kita tak payah berusaha ya?" Hmmm.

As for him who gives (in charity) and keeps his duty to Allah and fears Him, and believes in Goodness, We will make smooth for him the path of ease. But he who withholds and thinks himself self-sufficient, denies Goodness, We will make smooth for him the path of evil. [Surah al-Lail (92):5-10]

 “Adapun orang yang memberikan (menafkahkan hartanya) apa yang ada padanya ke jalan kebaikkan dan bertakwa (mengerjakan suruhan Allah dan meninggalkan segala laranganNya). Dan dia mengakui dengan yakin akan perkara yang baik. Maka sesungguhnya Kami akan memberikannya kemudahan untuk mendapat kesenangan (syurga). Sebaliknya orang yang bakhil (daripada berbuat kebaikkan) dan berasa cukup dengan kekayaan dan kemewahannya. Dan dia mendustakan perkara yang baik. Maka sesungguhnya Kami akan memberikannya kemudahan untuk mendapat kesusahan dan kesengsaraan. ”

Enuf said. Allah wants all of us not to question what has been written for us, but to strive on to do good wills, deeds and forbade us to depend on it.

Hence we created a platform for single people to search other singles in hopes of finding a suitable partner/marriage. InsyaAllah,  it is a start to meet new people and friends.It is a step forward and one of your efforts to finding your potential match. You never know what has been planned for you ;)

Soalan-soalan yang patut anda tanya bakal pasangan anda - bahagian 2

Minat/ Masa Lapang

• Apa aktiviti2 yang si dia minat di waktu lapang?
• Berapa banyak masa anda luangkan untuk menonton tv?
• Apakah minat yang akan anda kongsi dengan si dia?
• Berapa banyak masa yang anda ingin luangkan sendirian?
• Apakah pandangan anda tentang percutian berasingan?

Kehidupan Sosial

• Berapa banyak masa anda/si dia ingin luangkan bersama kawan-kawan?sebagai pasangan?bersama keluarga?sendirian?
• Apakah pandangan anda/si dia tentang mempunyai kawan yang berlainan jantina?

Tempat Tinggal

• Di mana anda mahu tinggal?Mengapa?
• Adakah anda mahu tinggal dekat dengan keluarga kamu?sedara mara kamu?
• Adakah anda suka tinggal di bandar? di kampung?

Anak

• Berapa ramai anak anda mahu?
• Bilakah anda rasa anda/si dia bersedia untuk menimang cahaya mata?
• Bagaimana anda akan membahagikan tugasan menjaga anak? (siapa jaga malam?siapa tukar lampin?dll)
• Apakah yang anda rasa penting untuk mengajar anak2?
• Apakah pandangan anda tentang cara menjaga anak?Adakah anda akan merotan?
• Adakah anda akan mengambil pembantu untuk menjaga anak anda?atau hantar ke rumah asuhan?tinggalkan bersama ibu bapa/sedara mara dll?
• Bagaimana anda akan pastikan anak anda akan mendapat pelajaran agama yang baik?
• Apakah yang anda akan lakukan jika anda tidak boleh mendapat anak?

Kewangan

• Berapa banyak akaun simpanan perlu anda ada?akaun semasa?bersama?
• Siapa yang perlu bayar bil-bil?
• Bagaimana dengan hak milik sebelum bersama?
• Bagaimana anda akan membahagikan wang untuk rumah?diri sendiri?untuk kebajikan?
• Berapa banyakkah pasangan anda boleh berbelanja tanpa perlukan izin anda terlebih dahulu?
• Berapa banyakkah wang hantaran yang akan diberi atau patut diberi?
• Katakanlah anda dan si dia dalam situasi kewangan yang agak ketat dan tiba-tiba adiknya atau abangnya datang untuk minta wang pinjaman untuk memulakan perniagaan (di mana yang 2 sebelumnya tidak berjaya)adakah anda akan membenarkannya?
• Apakah 5 keutamaan yang penting bagi anda untuk perancangan kewangan?

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